I was raised by my Mama and Scarlett O’Hara…
a summary of who
Hildie McQueen is.
with five children and a drunk for a husband. Always positive, she was one of the most amazing people I’ve ever known.
You are an American City, she often told us when we complained. She
couldn’t pronounce citizen, but that
was fine with me. Who doesn’t feel
important being an American City!
From my mother, I learned that it
can always be worse. Whenever she would
sit on the couch and rub Bengay onto her sore legs, she’d tell us stories of
how hard her life had been in Mexico, she took me to events in life that I
couldn’t even imagine. In other words…don’t
complain. Instead find a way to make
things better. Her mantra was “You have so many opportunities here in the
United States. Don’t waste them.” I heard this so many times, I would repeat
them at the same time she did. Sometimes
she’d throw a shoe at me.
Growing up poor and not fitting
in was confusing. When we moved to California from Mexico I was about six. I
wore two braids every day, so I didn’t look like any of the others at school. The
kids thought my sister and I were Native Americans and would jump around
pretending to do rain dances. In Mexico,
the natives are Mayans and Aztecs so we didn’t quite understand what they were
doing. I did know they were being mean.
So, I became lost in books at an
early age. My favorite books were of Dorrie the Little Witch, by Patricia Coombs. Not sure if any of you ever read them. Dorrie
didn’t quite fit in with the other witches and her socks never matched. I was so excited that I could be like
Dorrie. Remember my mother always
working and me having four siblings?
Yep, my socks rarely matched.
At about twelve, my parents
started having major problems, our house burned down and my father’s drinking
was getting pretty bad. So, we moved into the barrio in Southern San Diego. There we became part of a lively
community. It was a blast for those few
years. Everyone spoke Spanish and the
kids were more like me
When I was about twelve, I stumbled upon a book titled Island of the
Blue Dolphins by Scott O’Dell. I
read it over and over, marveling over this young girl who lived alone on a
deserted island. She didn’t have
anything and was so strong. Like me, she
didn’t have anything, no money, no toys for Christmas and certainly not much to
eat.
So I could definitely relate to Karana and she helped be stay strong
and find the positive in every day. If she could find a way to survive on a
deserted island, I certainly could handle my life.
When I got to High School, things
grew progressively worse and my parents finally separated. I remember the day all five of us kids stood
up to my father when he hit Mom. It was a crazy night and we ended up taken to
a hotel by a social worker. My poor mother
cried all night while my siblings and I had a party. We were excited to spend time in a hotel. To us the Holiday Inn was super fancy.
It was my junior year in High School when Gone with the Wind’s Scarlet
O’Hara found me and walked me through the next twenty-five years. I read the book nine times my senior year.
Scarlett was there when I didn’t get asked to prom. Held my hand when I joined
the Army and was away from home for the first time ever and she went with me
when I got stationed overseas.
Scarlet survived the Civil War
and had to find ways to feed all those who depended on her at only seventeen. At eighteen, I had to support my mother and four
siblings.
Scarlet married for financial
gain and to help those who depended on her. I married my first husband because
I wanted to live in a house and it would allow me to send more money home. Despite
many red flags we got married even though I am pretty sure we’d both changed our
minds right before the wedding ceremony. That darn Scarlet!
When I ended up a single mom in the rough streets of LA, It wasn’t
that bad when considering Scarlet went through having to deal with the Yankee
soldiers ravaging Tara. Crips, Yankees, same thing right?
Then when I finally met the man I
loved, thank goodness, I learned from Scarlet’s mistakes and unlike her, I made
sure not to lose my Rhett Butler.
I think I was destined to be a writer, it took me forty-five years
to find the courage to step out and finally fulfill it. Why Romance? Because I am in love with love. Who doesn’t want to waltz across a ballroom
with a handsome Duke, or ride the high seas with a dreamy pirate? There aren’t many women who wouldn’t love to
travel the Highlands of Scotland and find their own Jamie Fraser.
That feeling you get when the
hero and heroine finally kiss for the first time never gets old and it doesn’t
hurt that the lovemaking is always quite satisfying. In the romance genre,
there is always a happy ending and when you turn the last page, you do so with that
expectation.
So maybe you are not a reader,
but let me tell you something. It is
through the art of literature that we can walk in someone else’s shoes, see
distant places, travel in time and more than anything find yourself lost in a
story when you need to escape. I am not
sure where I’d be if not for Dorrie, Karana and Scarlett.
Thank God for those authors, the
stories and characters that guided me through life. I am so thankful to have always been a
reader, because otherwise I’m not sure how my life would have turned out.
So, I end with this.
Every single person reading this has a destiny to fulfill. Don’t cheat
yourself by settling. Like my Mama
always said. “You live in a country of
opportunities, Don’t waste them.”
What if today you decide to be Scarlet O’Hara?
